Main lobbydirectory
Rm 210 · Visiting hours bingoFront entrance
bingovisiting hoursmark the beach ballCode Beige
Recreation therapy
Visiting hours bingo
Observe the ward. Mark the card. Celebrate solemnly.
Visiting hours
Symptom bingo
Mark what you observe. Five in a row unlocks a Code Beige toast.
Center square is free. Like denial.
ST Joe's Computer Hospice · Wayfinding
Other rooms
You are here · Main lobby17 rooms
Enter another room — or hit Main lobby to return to the directory.
Intake & Triage
Level 1Sign in · assessment · on-call
- Rm 101Is it time?IntakeClinical flowchart. Miracle boots, Best Buy shame, ICD-PC stickers.Enter room →
- Rm 102Five stages of griefPastoralDenial through Acceptance — then a shareable stage diagnosis.Enter room →
- Rm 103Call DoctorOn-callIVR, hold music, Care+ cut-ins, voicemail to /dev/null.Enter room →
- Rm 104Waiting room camLobbyLive-ish power LED feed and a ticker of fake patients.Enter room →
Paperwork Wing
Level 1Forms · certificates · excuses
- Rm 110DNR certificateFormsName the machine. Download a screensaver.Enter room →
- Rm 111Discharge papersFormsReleased against medical advice. Still won't boot.Enter room →
- Rm 112Doctor's noteExcusePlease excuse OptiPlex — terminal Windows Update.Enter room →
- Rm 113Certificate packBundleAdmit → DNR → discharge → condolence. Full send-off.Enter room →
Chapel & Ceremony
Level 2Quiet hours preferred
- Rm 201Memorial wallChapelLast words, candles, Patient of the Week.Enter room →
- Rm 202Power-LED vigilChapelQuiet glow for machines in transition.Enter room →
- Rm 203Condolence cardChapelWe're sorry for your OptiPlex. Shareable preview.Enter room →
- Rm 204Last ritesCeremonyName + OS → a short eulogy for the group chat.Enter room →
Family Services
Level 2Visitors · retail · recreation
Administration
BasementHR · not Joe 3
Quiet hours · no forced firmwareEmergencies: ST Joe's AI (corner) · Code Beige
Select a room number to enter · elevators not guaranteed